Tuesday 19 February 2008

Lady in Distress

“I am a lady of considerable wealth having been forced into living in one of those dreadful old peoples homes full of lower class imbeciles! I am absolutely disgusted by the smell from certain invalids who make me want to vomit! The peculiar thing is how everyone appears to be resigned to these terrible conditions and just ignore me when I talk about the situation. What can be done about it?”From Lady Heightingon-Smythe

Loving Aunt Aggie replies: You poor thing. You have my heartfelt sympathy. I've heard just how smelly those places can be, so I suggest you dip a handkerchief in some cologne and wear it over your nose and mouth, not forgetting to remove it at meal times of course.

However, perhaps you are more aware of the problem than others because the smell is nearer than you care to admit. Try being honest with yourself dear! Isn't it a fact that people not only ignore you - but avoid you altogether?

Therefore why not ask the manager of the Home for an honest opinion, as at your time of life it should come as no surprise to learn that it is you yourself who is more than contributing to the overall pong in the Home. In fact they must be really nice people not to have pointed out your lack of hygiene before now, so you shouldn't feel embarrassed about approaching them as they will be quite used to having to deal with smelly old people like yourself.

Aunt Aggie © 2008